The Fathers Guild / The library

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Tools for the work of fatherhood.

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Growth

428 videos

Only Smart Men Will Need This Video

Pat examines what to do when your behavior contradicts your values and introduces a small daily action for closing that gap.

The Tools Real Men Collect

Pat uses the tools in his workshop to explain how to pick a personal development tool, practice with it, and apply it to a real problem.

do this if you have failed to quit the big 3 before

Pat explores what drives compulsive drinking, porn use, and scrolling and offers questions for identifying the need or feeling behind the urge.

A Reckoning Is Coming..

Pat reflects on the distance between the character men admire and the habits they live by, and on the effort it takes to bring those together.

You Have Potential. Cool. Now What?

Pat maps the gap between your current life and the life you want, then shows how to choose a starting point across health, freedom, and relationships.

The Story of The Fathers Guild

Pat tells the story of how The Fathers Guild began and how his own work as a father shaped its purpose.

What horror movies teach us about being a better father

Pat uses two horror-movie jump scares to show how anticipating a trigger can help fathers practice a calmer response.

What is The Fathers Guild community?

Pat explains who The Fathers Guild community is for and how its conversations, challenges, and accountability support fathers who want to grow.

Why Dads Don't Have Friends: A Fathers Reaction

Pat reacts to a Dude Dad video on why some fathers lack close friends and talks through how shared activities can make it easier to build friendships.

I am proud of how I handled this conflict

Pat recounts a conflict over homeschool work and reflects on staying calm, listening to his son, and choosing a proportionate consequence.

How To Stop Yelling At Your Kids

Pat walks through how fathers can notice the lead-up to yelling, practice a calmer response, and take responsibility when they lose their temper.

Mother Of 4 Feels Like A Failure

Taz Barber talks with Pat about feeling like she’s failing as a mom after a hard stretch and how she thinks about the needs of their four kids.

Little bit of BDE

Pat tries Buddy, his accountability tool, and shows how he sets a real training goal, chooses a check-in style, and schedules the next action.

Why You Don’t Journal (And How to Finally Start)

Pat addresses what gets in the way of journaling and offers a way to start reflecting regularly.

4 Things Every Father Will Face (Ready or Not)

Pat shares what helped him handle four common transitions in fatherhood, from messy diaper changes and apologizing after an outburst to shifts in intimacy and identity.

Why Some Fathers Have a Short Fuse (And Others Don’t)

Pat defines emotional regulation as noticing and naming what you feel, then choosing a response. He shares ways fathers can practice that skill.

What Happens At The Fathers Retreat?

A preview of The Fathers Guild retreat and the space it gives dads to step away from their routines, reflect, and spend time with other fathers.

Why You Keep Quitting Fitness And How to Stop

Pat looks at why workout habits fall apart and how to set up a training routine that is easier to keep through the demands of fatherhood.

Quit Quitting

People often do the opposite of what they should when they fail. Here's a better thing to do

How to use trolls for personal growth

Pat walks through his reaction to a critical comment about knowledge and wisdom, using the exchange to practice noticing his defensiveness before he responds.

One Workout a Week for 25 Weeks This Is How Fathers Build Consistency

Pat explains the idea behind committing to one workout a week for 25 weeks and how a small repeatable commitment helps fathers establish a training habit.

You’re Not Broken. You’re Underdeveloped.

Reflecting on turning 40, Pat explains what maturity can look like in training, money, and giving and receiving love.

Don't Be Fooled. The "Fitness" industry is not Fit

Pat critiques the fitness industry’s incentives and asks how much of what gets marketed as fitness helps people build real physical capability.

This is how dad stopped MISSING workouts

Pat shows how Street Parking’s adjustable workouts let him keep training through busy weeks and change the intensity to match what he has available.

Chris Williamson has almost everything

Using a clip of Chris Williamson, Pat reflects on how accepting that you’re enough can help you receive love and appreciate the life you already have.

Three types of generational trauma you might be passing on without knowing it

Pat looks at three patterns fathers can pass on through their example, including how they handle health habits, the pursuit of money, and their sense of agency.

Are You a Fragile Man… and Don’t Know It?

Pat examines how fragility can show up in a man’s response to pressure and uses it as a prompt for assessing where he needs to grow.

How to be a Legendary Father

Using Bandit from Bluey as an example, Pat explains how belief in your ability to change, recovery after stress, and consistent practice can develop the traits you want as a dad.

If you are not the man you want to be you are missing this

Pat explains how consistency turns the belief that you can change and an understanding of stress and recovery into progress you can see.

This is the simple but profound equation for human change

Pat explains how stress and recovery work together to produce change, applying the idea to physical training and the way fathers build capacity for daily life.

Becoming a better Father is only possible by developing this

Pat explains self-efficacy, the belief that you can succeed at a specific change, and shares three ways fathers can strengthen it.

Not All Fathers Belong Here

Pat explains the expectations of The Fathers Guild and the kind of commitment to practice and accountability the community asks of fathers.

Cringe with me at my overblown freakout on my son

Pat looks back on a moment when he overreacted to his son and examines where he lost his composure and what he could have done differently.

I wish I would have figured this out sooner...

Pat reflects on finding meaning as a man and father by developing strength, competence, kindness, and the ability to connect.

A guide for fathers to get off their phone

A practical guide to changing phone habits and giving more of your attention to the people and activities you care about at home.

You don't want a simpler life as a father. You want this

Pat reflects on screen distractions, money, and the responsibilities he wants to make room for as he tries to give more attention to his family.

This is the only way we grow as a father

Pat uses the idea of antifragility to explain how fathers can grow through difficulty when they leave time to recover and reflect on what happened.

This One Thing About Saunas Changed My Life as a Father

Pat describes how sauna time became a form of quiet reflection and gave him space to work through what was on his mind.

The worst parenting mistake we can make? #parenting #fatherhood

Pat explains how stress from elsewhere in a parent’s day can lead to an outsized consequence and shares how to repair after overreacting.

30 Journal Prompts For Fathers

Pat introduces 30 journal prompts designed to help fathers reflect on how they show up at home and identify what they want to practice.

Never Make The Same Parenting Mistake Twice

Pat discusses how reviewing a parenting mistake can help you understand what happened and choose a different response next time.

How to not die

Pat uses the image of carrying a 50-pound bomb to talk about the weight of responsibility and when to rest or ask for help.

The Most Important Step A Man Can Take

Pat introduces The Next Step podcast, explains its name, and shares why he wants to learn from other parents as he works on his own fatherhood.

Dumb Phone = Smart Dad

Pat explores using a basic phone to reduce digital distractions and be more present with his family.

This video is a challenge you should take

Pat asks parents to list the qualities they hope their children develop, then look at which of those qualities they need to model more consistently themselves.

A 1 Step Process For Making Better Decisions As A Father

Pat shows how taking a breath, counting, or stepping away briefly can create enough space to choose a better response in a heated parenting moment.

Is what you do for them or you?

Pat asks parents to examine whose needs are driving decisions about their children’s sports, schooling, and food.

Asking My Wife What She Thinks About My No Yell Challenge

Pat asks Taz what she thinks of his No Yell Challenge and invites her to share what she’s noticed at home.

Day 8 No Yelling Update

Pat checks in on day eight of his No Yell Challenge and reflects on how the attempt to change his reactions is going.

$5 Every time I yell... It's going to be a long month

Pat explains his $5 consequence for yelling and shares what he’s learning early in a month of trying to respond differently.

Why Should I Make A Post For My Sons Birthday?

Pat considers who benefits when he posts a birthday message for a son who doesn’t use Instagram and reflects on the role of online validation.

Setting a higher standard for Fatherhood

Pat reflects on the example fathers set and what it means to expect more of himself in everyday family life.

I want to be a better father

Pat explains why he wants to document becoming a better father, including being more connected with his kids and following through on what he tells them.

Reflecting on last week

In this Monday livestream, Pat reflects on a hard week, talks through what went well and where he slipped, and shares what he’s trying to learn from it.

What do you choose?

Pat asks young men to treat a gap between their beliefs and actions as a chance to grow.

Good luck ❤️🤘🏻

Pat argues that communication, genuine connection, and taking action are especially valuable when information is easy to find.

Get clear on what you want. Find the doable step. Prove consistency. Get what you want. 🤘🏻

Pat lays out a process for defining a goal, picking a manageable daily step, and building on it after showing up consistently.

This post is not about being better than other people. It's about how little it takes to....

Pat proposes paying close attention to your habits for two weeks and seeing how small adjustments move you forward.

I have more ideas than I can execute on. I've made so many things for fathers that........

Pat introduces the Fathers Guild Toolbox as one place to find the resources he has made for dads.

This too shall pass. Thank you @harryheptonstall for the amazing design work.

Pat shows his new shirts and explains how their message reminds him to ride out hard stretches and pay attention during good ones.

Just wanted to share my journey back to consistency.

Pat describes rebuilding his workout habit after losing motivation and giving himself room to return to consistent training.

Check this New Podcast with Brennan Falks #Podcast

A preview of Brennan Falks and Pat’s conversation about teaching children and living by principles.

The real trick is figuring out what is going to make YOU consistent.

Pat asks what kind of accountability would actually keep you showing up for a goal you care about.

Some people get lucky faster. Could be their genetics OR their family OR be the universe. Who Knows?

Pat reflects on how making more attempts can give luck more opportunities to find you.

What would make you actually do what you said you would? A bet? A prize? Pain? A mindset shift?

Pat asks whether a bet, a prize, a group, or a mindset shift would help you follow through on your word.

Check this New Podcast with Michael Mahoney #Podcast

A preview of Pat’s conversation with Michael Mahoney about emotional resilience and self-awareness in fatherhood.

If you want to join us, just check out the guild community .

Pat lays out a phone challenge with screen-free mornings, bedtimes, and meals for fathers who want to be more present.

There's no one right way to do any of this. #shorts

Pat encourages parents to reflect on why they choose a particular approach and who it helps.

Full conversation with Thefathersguild on the Tom Rowland Podcast, EP 1030. Link in bio. #shorts

Pat tells Tom Rowland how his sons set the terms of his $5-per-yell challenge and collected the first payment within minutes.

Check this New Podcast with Michael Mahoney #Podcast #shorts #shorts

A clip promoting Michael Mahoney’s episode on how fathers can handle their triggers and build resilience at home.

This is from an 11 minute video on my YouTube of how I structure my own personal development #shorts

Pat explains how he organizes his personal development around closing the gap between his current habits and the person he wants to become.

I have my shirt off because I just worked out and it's hot. #shorts

Pat calls on fathers to pay attention to the work they do on their character and habits behind closed doors.

I've met a number of men who live this balance. Hoping to meet many more. #shorts

Pat describes mature masculinity as combining strength and power with warmth, playfulness, and a willingness to let people in.

Maybe it's one of those things where the larger the hill of failures the more speed I'll hav #shorts

Pat reflects on his recent failures and hopes the experience will help him gain momentum when he finds his footing.

For some of us this might be our first experience of unconditional love. #shorts

Pat talks about the unconditional love fathers feel for their children and how it can motivate them to grow.

My recent plan of attack is that I write a big long list on Monday... #shorts

Pat takes stock of what he completed each Monday to get a more accurate picture of a week that felt unproductive day to day.

I've always had a pretty firm grip on internal insights. #shorts

Pat reflects on learning to pay attention to how his behavior lands with others, alongside understanding his own intentions.

Very interesting to watch the comments come through. #shorts

Pat examines the response to a viral Jason Lewis clip about the responsibility adults take on when they bring a child into the world.

Check this Conversation with Jason Lewis | Podcast #podcast #shorts

A preview of Jason Lewis and Pat’s conversation about self-awareness, emotional history, and being a dad.

Check this Conversation with Jason Lewis | Podcast #podcast #shorts

A Jason Lewis podcast clip from the conversation on what fathers learn about themselves through parenting.

Check this Conversation with Jason Lewis | Podcast #podcast #shorts

A clip from the Jason Lewis episode on how self-reflection can shape the way you parent.

Please do this with my information as well. #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to use their own judgment when deciding which ideas to adopt, including the ones he shares.

Check this Conversation with Jason Lewis | Podcast #podcast #shorts

A Jason Lewis episode preview about the self-knowledge and presence fathers bring to raising their children.

Catch the full conversation of this latest Podcast with Jason Lewis on my YouTube Channel #shorts

A teaser for the full Jason Lewis conversation on emotional awareness and the lessons of fatherhood.

Catch the full conversation of this latest Podcast with Jason Lewis on my YouTube Channel #shorts

An excerpt promoting Pat’s conversation with Jason Lewis about personal history and the way it shapes parenting.

When you become a father, you give up any sort of perfect conditions... #shorts

Pat reflects on accepting imperfect conditions as a father and making room for training and other habits anyway.

I'm not against people posting with their shirt off. #shorts

Pat questions the assumption that a muscular or lean physique tells you how disciplined or healthy someone is.

Life is unpredictable. Life with children is extremely unpredictable. #shorts

Pat encourages fathers to adapt their health habits when family life gets unpredictable and keep a long, active life in view.

The higher our own ceilings are, the better start our children will have. #shorts

Pat asks fathers to develop their physical, emotional, and relational capacities so their kids have a stronger example to build from.

No one can give you the things I mentioned. #shorts

Pat describes the Fathers Guild as a place to test personal changes, ask honest questions, and find other men to hold you accountable.

Still one of my favorite phrases I've heard over the last few months. #shorts

Pat explains how committing to his family gave him purpose and made status and other old priorities feel less important.

❤️🤘🏻 #shorts

Pat reflects on being judged for checking his phone at a playground and how much context strangers miss in a brief moment.

To be truly authoritative you have to have a higher capacity to handle many different situat #shorts

Pat describes the range authoritative parenting asks of adults, including clear rules, compassion, playfulness, and consistent standards.

Catch this Latest Podcast with Donovan Owens on my YouTube Channel #shorts

A Donovan Owens podcast preview on personal principles and the daily practices that help men live by them.

I honestly think that there's going to be a separation in humanity #shorts

Pat considers how easy access to AI-generated answers could affect independent judgment and the value of lived experience.

I genuinely do hope you find some peace and paradise. • #antifragile #authoritativefatherhoo #shorts

Pat wishes fathers some peace as they work through hardship and develop a more deliberate way of parenting.

Catch the full conversation on my YouTube Channel #shorts

A podcast excerpt about keeping purpose, close relationships, and adventure in view alongside financial success.

Getting an answer is easy. Knowing whether it’s a good one is harder. #shorts

Pat and Ben Skutnik discuss testing the answers you get, checking your reasoning with other people, and changing course when the evidence calls for it.

Catch this Latest Podcast with Donovan Owens on my YouTube Channel #shorts

A clip promoting the Donovan Owens episode about building routines and applying principles in daily life.

The money conversation is important #shorts

Pat asks prospective parents to prepare for the stress and relationship demands of having children alongside the financial ones.

Catch this Latest Podcast with Donovan Owens on my YouTube Channel #shorts

A preview of Donovan Owens’s conversation with Pat about accountability, personal systems, and practicing the kind of man you want to be.

Catch this Latest Podcast with Donovan Owens on my YouTube Channel #shorts #shorts

Donovan Owens defines masculinity through the safety, support, resources, and accountability a man brings to the people around him.

Exhausting and tiring at first, easiest driving after some practice. #authoritative #shorts

Pat compares learning to stay calm with learning to drive, where a demanding skill takes less conscious effort after enough practice.

I am not trying to optimize my life. I am trying to build the capacity to live more of it. #shorts

Pat describes building enough capacity to handle life’s demands and take part in more of the things he values.

If we want to grow here, fortunately or unfortunately, the only way to do it is through trai #shorts

Pat explains how focused effort, recovery, and reflection can turn deliberate practice into growth.

Catch this Latest Podcast with Donovan Owens on my YouTube Channel #shorts

A clip promoting Pat’s conversation with Donovan Owens on turning values and intentions into repeatable habits.

Untitled #shorts

Pat responds to a friend who finds his posts demanding and explains why he asks fathers to examine where they can grow.

What do you think my son learned from this experience? #shorts

Pat revisits an adventure with his son that went off plan and reflects on what kids learn when families recover from a scare together.

These two things can be worked on simultaneously.... #shorts

Pat describes working on two skills together, expanding your capacity for stress and choosing a steadier response on difficult days.

The weekly ledger. It's gonna evolve overtime to be as meaningful as I can make it. 🤘🏻 #shorts

Pat introduces the Weekly Ledger as a regular reflection practice and shares his plans to refine it over time.

Not trying to start a battle around this. This is not a man versus woman debate. #shorts

Pat looks at what notes left for a partner can reveal about trust, control, and how responsibility is shared at home.

One of the cool "hidden" things about being further back than where you want to be #shorts

Pat compares early gains in physical training with the progress that can come from beginning to work on emotional development.

Check this Conversation with Phil Tarling | Podcast #shorts

A preview of Pat’s conversation with image consultant Phil Tarling about first impressions, family life, and being present.

What's Best for the Relationship? ❤️🤘🏻 Put the Relationship First #shorts

Pat recalls a conversation with his wife about making choices with the health of their relationship in mind.

You want calm amongst the chaos? You have to grow. #shorts

Pat explains why handling the chaos of fatherhood calmly takes practice and why shared challenges are part of The Fathers Guild.

This is not an ad I just genuinely love this tool. #shorts

Pat shows an Unpluq tool he uses to interrupt automatic phone use.

A Podcast with Rob Bill Jr #shorts

In a clip with Rob Bill Jr., the conversation turns to how trying to make family life go perfectly can create tension at home.

This fired me up. Had to completely steal it from @hunt.as.one and add my own bit of nerd at the end

A reaction to a Hunt As One clip with Pat adding his own take at the end.

Wed morning thoughts. Lasts and firsts. #shorts

Pat shares a Wednesday morning reflection on noticing firsts and lasts as life moves along.

Part 2 of 2 #shorts

Pat reflects on how years of working through disagreements helped him and his wife communicate and make each other feel heard.

Latest PODCAST 🎙️with Stefanos Sifandos | Check out the full episode on my YouTube channel. #shorts

A Stefanos Sifandos podcast excerpt about two ingredients for personal growth.

Go get 'em, you adaptable S.O.B you 🤘🏻 #shorts

Pat reflects on the human ability to adapt and suggests testing which recurring habits or situations still serve you.

If you want to do it on your own just comment or DM - "no yell" on my Instagram post. #shorts

Pat reflects on three years of working on his reactions and invites fathers to try the No Yell Challenge.

Checkout My latest Podcast with Stefanos Sifandos #shorts

A preview of Pat’s discussion with Stefanos Sifandos on emotional honesty, relationships, and personal growth.

Ask Yourself These Questions Every Night #shorts

Pat shares the questions he asks at night to review his choices, notice recurring thoughts, and see where he acted with integrity.

Between when something happens to when you respond, there should be space and thought. #shorts

Pat offers ways to create a pause before responding under pressure, including taking a breath or stepping away for a moment.

"A man is no larger than the smallest thing that provokes him” #shorts

Pat reflects on what the size of his triggers can tell him about his capacity to stay steady.

The mic failed, so this is rescued camera audio, which makes it sound like I'm in a tunnel. #shorts

Pat shares what he learned from retreats and conversations with dads about how common struggles with presence, communication, and health can be.

I've said this before on here, but there's a big difference between reacting and responding #shorts

Pat explains how building a pause makes it possible to notice an automatic reaction and choose how to respond.

The Grief, The Part of Healing Nobody Talks About #shorts

Pat discusses the place of grief in healing and what it means to make room for pain after a loss.

Change is much easier when you have a really good reason. #shorts

Pat reflects on recognizing his own habits in his children and using that insight as a reason to change.

To be clear, I'm not talking about fitness I'm talking about personal development. #shorts

Pat talks about finding people who challenge you to grow as a father, partner, friend, and leader.

"Life before death, strength before weakness, journey before destination" #shorts

Pat explains how the first ideal of the Knights Radiant from The Stormlight Archive became part of The Fathers Guild’s values.

Listen to it, learn from it. Take on board a little bit of it. Not Every Piece of Advice Is #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to learn from advice and test whether it fits the real circumstances of their lives.

I know the point of the original post was actually to inspire young people to take action! #shorts

Pat reflects on how his idea of reaching his potential has shifted from competing in CrossFit to developing his mental and emotional abilities.

This is silly, but it's genuinely the conversation I had with myself this morning. #shorts

Pat describes how fear, anger, guilt, and loneliness can provide information to think through before deciding what to do.

For dads who love their kids and know there's always room to grow. #shorts

Pat introduces a community for dads to talk honestly, work on monthly challenges, and keep developing as fathers.

The internet is weird #shorts

Pat reflects on filming a family fireworks mishap and reconsidering how much of that moment he wanted to share online.

Be great! It starts with looking in the mirror🪞- Episode 24 with Pat, the Fathers Guild Dad, out now

A podcast clip in which Pat calls on fathers to take ownership of the work their families benefit from.

One thing anxiety loves is certainty. #shorts

Pat reflects on the uncertainty of parenting and on building trust in your family’s ability to handle difficult situations.

Games are a lot more fun when you know which one you're playing and play it accordingly. #shorts

Pat asks viewers to identify whether they’re pursuing status, peace, money, connection, or legacy before deciding how to spend their effort.

One of the hardest parts of parenting is knowing when to step in and when to step back. #shorts

Dr. Kathryn Hecht talks about deciding when to step in and when to give children space to handle a challenge.

One of the hardest parts of parenting is watching your kids struggle. #shorts

Pat reflects on the anxiety of watching a child struggle and how to keep that discomfort from setting the child’s limits.

Anybody else have some thoughts on that? manosphere #shorts

Pat reflects on why he follows conversations about the manosphere and what he hopes men can take from those conversations for their families.

Due to the weight of life it can sometimes feel like they have your number and are out to get you.

Pat reminds parents that young kids are usually focused on their own needs and learn regulation by watching how adults respond.

Why Punishment Often Doesn't Work | Podcast with Jon Fogel #shorts

Jon Fogel explains why a child in survival mode has a harder time learning from punishment.

Both apologies and learning moments have gone better for me this way. ❤️💀🤘🏻 #shorts

Pat reflects on slowing down, owning a mistake, and staying connected so both the apology and the lesson have room to land.

One of my core principles as a father and a man is honesty and integrity. #shorts

Pat explains why honesty with himself and with other people is foundational to the way he wants to develop as a man and father.

Thanks Frank. You are a damn good man your family is lucky to have you ❤️🤘🏻 #shorts

Pat thanks Frank and reflects on the value of meeting men who are working to show up better in their relationships.

Attention Nutrition is a thing right. #shorts

Pat asks viewers to be deliberate about the videos, headlines, arguments, and notifications they give their attention to.

Also not having that mustache was a pretty big deal... #shorts

Pat looks back at an old look with humor and reflects on how confident he felt about it at the time.

When I recognized that the life I had was guided by my responses to the situations.... #shorts

Pat reflects on how examining and changing his responses to difficult situations gave him more influence over the life he was building.

The most important step a man can take. It’s not the first one, is it? #shorts

Pat shares the Stormlight Archive passage that reminds him to focus on the next step when he is struggling.

Not sure what your plan is for fatherhood, but I’m trying to be king of the Pirates. #shorts

Pat uses a pirate reference to talk about anger at home and the practice of responding differently through the No Yell Challenge.

Are you giving too much or not enough? #wisdom #contentment #youareenough #podcast #shorts

Pat considers whether constantly asking if you are giving enough makes it harder to notice when you are running yourself down.

"I Don't Have Time" Is Usually the Sign If You're Too Busy for This, You Probably Need It Most!

Pat addresses overextended fathers and asks them to consider the value of making time to step away and reset.

You Weren't Meant to Do This Alone #shorts

Pat discusses finding a community that fits your circumstances and asking other people for support when you need it.

Modern fatherhood isn't just about providing | Podcast with Darren Silver #shorts

Darren Silver talks about nature, awareness, and choosing what kind of father and partner you want to become.

"Kids of iPad Parents." Not my phrase, but it hits a little too close to home. #shorts

Pat reflects on the phrase “kids of iPad parents” and what family screen habits can mean for the attention children receive.

I Went Off-Grid for 5 Days. Here's What Happened. #shorts

Pat shares what five days away from screens and usual routines felt like while hosting an off-grid gathering for fathers.

Ill see ya in 4 Days 🤘🏻 #shorts

Pat signs off for four days as he gets ready to host six men for a phone-free retreat.

No regrets. Not even one letter. If you don't know what movie that's from, all good. #shorts

Pat uses a movie reference to reflect on learning from mistakes, finding the humor in them, and moving forward.

The 2 Phases of Real Change Everyone Goes Through #shorts

Pat outlines what to do when you start considering a change and how to move from gathering information to taking action.

Give Yourself Some Grace, The Part Where You Suck Is Part of the Process, Keep Going! #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to give themselves grace when they are new to a skill and keep practicing through the awkward early stage.

These Devices Are Designed to Keep You Hooked | Even Adults Can’t Put These Devices Down… #shorts

Pat explains why devices make continued use so easy and asks parents to consider that design when setting limits.

Accepting My Own Immaturity Changed My Life #shorts

Pat describes how admitting his own immaturity gave him a starting point for changing how he showed up at home.

The Small Decisions That Quietly Change Your Life | Latest Podcast with LOREN FJORD #shorts

Loren Fjord and Pat discuss how small decisions can add up to better health and greater capacity when you repeat them over time.

3 Years Later: I’m a Better Father Than I Was #shorts

Pat revisits footage of losing his temper with his four-year-old and reflects on how he handles similar moments three years later.

My journey began when I realized there was no space between what happened and my reaction. #shorts

Pat describes the start of his No Yell journey and how he began working on the gap between a trigger and his response.

Yelling at Kids Is Not a Sign of Strength #shorts

Pat challenges the idea that yelling builds strong children and discusses the strength it takes to manage his own reactions.

One more piece of evidence that I’m the man I say and think I am. • @streetparking FTW #shorts

Pat logs a Street Parking workout and reflects on using completed actions as evidence that he is living by his values.

Even when I know it works, it can still be hard to remember—and even harder to do. That’s parenting.

Pat describes how easy it is to forget an approach that works for his son in the moment and why it takes repeated practice.

Fatherhood Gets Easier When You Accept Reality #fatherhood #dadlife #herosjourney #shorts

Pat reflects on how accepting the stage of fatherhood he is actually in helps him respond to it with more ease.

Why Hard Work Feels Better When You Can See the Results #shorts

Pat shares the satisfaction of physically demanding work when he can see what he accomplished at the end of the day.

I’ve received several messages recently asking this question in response to my recent content.

Pat explains why he returned to social media after three years away and started sharing his own perspective on fatherhood.

I’ve had a few DM’s recently about this due to a few of my recent posts. #shorts

Pat answers why he still posts despite his reservations about social media and talks about creating The Fathers Guild in response.

What would you do with that time? #shorts

Pat asks viewers what they would do with more time and considers what those answers reveal about their family, health, and relationship priorities.

"For my kids, I want that man to be me." Be the Man You Want Your Kids to Become #shorts

Pat reflects on the responsibility of becoming the kind, capable man his kids can look to as an example.

Are you the rock your family needs, or are you still fighting old battles? #shorts

Pat reflects on how practicing emotional regulation helped him become steadier in moments when his family needed him.

Is your "self-sacrifice" actually hurting your kids? #shorts

Pat questions whether always putting himself last gives his children the capable, present father he wants them to have.

The most important step a man can take is the next one. Don't let failure stop you. #shorts

Pat encourages fathers who have slipped back into an old response to take the next step and keep working on the change.

I’ll join you. #shorts #dadlifematters #fatherhood #thefathersguild #growthmindset #parenting

Pat invites dads to practice growth through a challenge that gives them room for both stress and recovery.

Others' opinions are tools; your self-perception is your true power.(Also, my cat is a traitor 🐱)

Pat discusses considering feedback from others while keeping responsibility for how he sees and evaluates himself.

Building Men in a World Adrift #shorts #podcast #interview #motivational

Don Ross outlines five qualities his men’s groups work to develop, including courage, practical skill, and honor.

Relax, Reset, and Grow: Final Call for Fathers. 3 Spots Left for the Father’s Retreat 🧭 #shorts

Pat invites dads to a retreat where they can step away from daily demands, reflect, and spend time with other fathers.

Fatherhood provides a specific kind of freedom: the freedom from immature priorities. #shorts

Pat reflects on the freedom he found when accepting fatherhood’s responsibilities helped him let go of older priorities.

Adulthood shouldn't mean the end of your tribe. Reclaim your honor. #shorts

Pat discusses the role of close male friendships and accountability in maintaining a sense of honor through adulthood.

Freedom from choice. If you accept this, it’s an amazing freedom. #shorts

Pat reflects on the relief of accepting responsibility for his family and letting that commitment guide his choices.

I haven’t really found a place this doesn’t apply yet. Of course simple doesn’t mean easy. Good luck

Pat explains how combining a meaningful stressor with recovery can lead to growth in training and everyday life.

Why Men Fail Alone (But Win Together) | Isolation is the Enemy. Community is the Cure #shorts

Pat discusses how taking action and holding one another accountable in a men’s group can help people sustain change.

The Ultimate Audit: Facing Your Own Death 💀 #shorts

Pat uses a reflection on mortality to ask whether his time and choices match the life he wants.

I don’t think you’re broken. But if you do, it’s time to seek help. #shorts

Pat encourages men who feel broken to seek professional support and treats asking for help as a sign of strength.

Discipline Isn’t Born, It’s Built: Understanding the Roots of Success #shorts

Pat asks viewers to look at the experiences that built another person’s discipline before adopting their methods.

The Secret to Lasting Change: Why Knowing the "Where" Matters More Than the "How" #shorts

Pat explains why knowing where someone started helps you decide whether the changes that worked for them fit your life.

This is why I just try to be the best, I can be, of Myself. It makes the rest of my parenting easier

Pat describes how working on his own habits makes parenting easier as his children take cues from what he does.

Don’t get me wrong I’m not done growing. I have many parts of me that are still immature. #shorts

Pat reflects on being able to hear criticism and take offense less easily as one sign that he is maturing.

I’m here for the Heroes. | 15 days left to join me on May The Hero’s Journey #shorts

Pat invites fathers to take on The Hero’s Journey and consider the part they want to play in their family’s story.

Phones steal our presence. A developing brain doesn’t stand a chance. Be the filter. 📲 #shorts

Pat asks parents to set boundaries around phones and protect children’s attention from highly stimulating content.

Stop trying to win ten battles at once. Win one. 🛡️ #shorts

Pat introduces Buddy as an accountability tool and explains why he recommends working on one clear goal at a time.

Stop Being Fragile, Start Being Honest #Fatherhood #TheFathersGuild #HerosJourney #Honesty #shorts

Pat discusses why being honest about vulnerability can help men develop the strength to face difficult things.

This has been blowing my mind recently with the contrarian stances I see people taking about on here

Pat discusses using skepticism to learn and recognizing when taking a contrary position stops helping him see the issue more clearly.

There isn’t just one "correct" way to parent—there are many paths to success in this role. #shorts

Pat reflects on the many ways families can raise children well and on being someone his own kids can learn from.

My Personal Journey with Anxiety | Real Talk on Mental Health | The Father’s Inner Battle #shorts

Pat talks about his experience with anxiety and the role of admitting fear and asking for support in becoming a steadier leader.

Why Self-Examination Feels Like an Attack #shorts

Pat explains why examining the effects of his parenting can feel threatening and how that discomfort can point to something worth changing.

How to Thrive (Not Just Survive) #Fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat talks about seeing fatherhood as a meaningful opportunity when the day-to-day demands make it feel like survival.

The Secret to Real Self-Worth #HerosJourney #SelfWorth #PersonalGrowth #Values #shorts

Pat recommends naming your values and using actions that reflect them as evidence you can trust and respect yourself.

Reset Your Brain: The Science of Intimacy #MarriageAdvice #MensHealth #Legacy #HerosJourney #shorts

Pat asks viewers to examine what is driving their desire for intimacy and how that awareness can inform a relationship.

My Framework for Navigating the Chaos #Shorts #Gratitude #Presence #SelfImprovement #shorts

Pat reflects on why gratitude journals used to feel forced and how giving more attention to everyday life changed what he noticed.

Surface Level Negativity vs. Deep Connection #shorts

Pat shares how one-on-one conversations and replies to direct messages can reveal more about people than their public comments.

I’d love to hear thoughts on this. | Happy Easter to you and your families. #Easter2026 #shorts

Watching an Easter sunrise, Pat asks how much gratitude comes from what he has and how much comes from noticing it.

Looking for My People: The Tech-Boundary Movement #TechBoundaries #Parenting #HerosJourney #shorts

Pat looks for other families who want to use technology deliberately and make space for life away from their screens.

Thank you Mark Manson for always putting out such great stuff - Shared Eric Hoffer's quote #shorts

Pat uses an Eric Hoffer quote shared by Mark Manson to reflect on focusing his attention on his own life and responsibilities.

My 3-Year Evolution Update

Pat reflects on three years of changing how he approaches himself and his family, including becoming more curious about the people around him.

Your Hero's Journey Starts with a Challenge | Challenges = Change. Are you ready? #DadLife #shorts

Pat introduces The Hero’s Journey as a way to practice intentional changes in training, drinking, or how you communicate at home.

Reposting this because there are a lot of new people here | From 500 to 200,000: The Journey So Far.

A repost introducing Pat and his family, with an update on how The Fathers Guild audience has grown since he first shared it.

Stop worrying about being labeled "dangerous" by the wounded. Focus on embodying #shorts

Pat reflects on why he evaluates how safe and dependable he is through his behavior and the people who know him well.

Stop Reacting, Start Responding: A 4-Step Guide #shorts

Pat outlines four steps for creating a pause before reacting, identifying what made it hard, adjusting his habits, and repeating the process.

Are you addicted, or are you just unregulated? Addiction vs. Overdoing It. #Fatherhood #shorts

Pat asks viewers who tend to overdo a behavior to examine what is happening in their emotional state when the urge comes up.

React vs. Respond: The 3-Year Journey #herosjourney #fatherhood #discipline #parenting #shorts

Pat compares his reaction to a triggering situation with how he might have responded three years earlier and reflects on practicing regulation.

From Night Owl to Early Bird: The Hero's Journey 🌅 #successhabits #earlybird #parenting #shorts

Pat describes going from a night owl to waking before his family and why quiet morning time became part of The Hero’s Journey.

We’ve confused "healthy" with "comfortable." #fatherhood #motivation #thefathersguild #shorts

Pat shares his reaction to a Kathryn Hecht talk and considers how manageable discomfort can help children grow.

2.5 Years of Growth: The Truth Behind the No-Yell Challenge. Comment “HERO” for more info. #shorts

Pat revisits the video that explained his original No Yell Challenge and fills in context viewers missed in the viral clip.

Art: The Bridge Between Our Experiences | The Fathers Guild Podcast #shorts #podcast #fatherhood

Blake Kasemeier discusses how art and language help people share experiences and how that ability carries into parenting.

Stop giving your family your "leftover" energy. My family deserves the best version of me.🔋 #shorts

Pat reflects on giving his family more of his attention and energy and uses journaling to see where that needs work.

A tiny fraction of my audience will see this, but I think it’s worth posting nonetheless. #shorts

Pat reposts a No Yell Challenge reflection about creating space between what a child does and the way a father reacts.

The 7-Day Life Reset | Audit Your Habits Is your daily routine actually working for you? 🔄⚡ #shorts

Devin Linder explains a seven-day reset that starts by auditing which parts of a daily routine are helping and which need attention.

"I hate it most when my dad screams." 💔The $5 Yelling Fine | 30-Day Challenge #shorts #parenting

Pat shares how his children’s feedback about his yelling led him to try a 30-day challenge with a $5 penalty.

Why Your Food Choices Matter | The Father's Guild #shorts

Pat talks about learning how food affects everyday energy and how eating habits support the other things he wants to do.

How to Turn Your Thoughts into Reality | Devin Linder x The Father's Guild #shorts

Devin Linder discusses using visualization and accountability to make a career and life change he had been thinking about.

Wisdom given vs wisdom earned. Lived experience is the only real teacher. 🛡️✨ #shorts

Pat argues that experience and practice are how information becomes wisdom a father can use.

Stop parenting for the approval of others. 🛡️🛑 The fear of judgment is the silent killer! #shorts

In a clip with Here For The Dads, Pat discusses making parenting choices according to what the child needs when other people may judge them.

Sometimes you just need a push to do the "simple" things🛠️ #HerosJourney #Growth #shorts

Pat reflects on how a challenge can prompt him to finally do something simple that improves life at home.

There is No Blueprint for Fatherhood 🛠️✨#Fatherhood #shorts

A podcast excerpt about learning who you are becoming through the process of fatherhood.

Why Your Circle Defines Your Fatherhood. ❤️💀Words from @save.your.sons #Fatherhood #DadsLif #shorts

Pat reflects on choosing friends who support his growth and influence how he shows up for his family.

You’d be surprised how much more you’ll actually journal if you just remove, basic barriers #shorts

Pat shares the simple habit of keeping a pen ready so he can start journaling when he has a moment.

What actually makes the difference between a "good" man and a great one? 🤔💬 #Fatherhood #shorts

Pat asks viewers what quality or practice they think helps a good man grow into a great one.

It took $400 and 3 years to build this "privilege." 🛠️🔥 #shorts

Pat explains how a low-cost sauna build took years to finish and reflects on the roles of luck, resources, and persistence.

I will fight it tooth and nail and never say die. 👊🔥 #Fatherhood #success #shorts

Pat talks about continuing to fight for the attention and resilience he wants to bring to fatherhood.

You are awesome. You can be awesomer. How cool is that. 🚀 #Mindset #fatherhood #dadlife #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to appreciate who they already are and stay open to what they can still develop.

Stop waiting for the "perfect" time to start. It doesn’t exist. ⏳ #StreetParking #Motivation #shorts

Pat shares how Street Parking’s “Why Wait” approach helps him begin training with the time and circumstances he has.

Journaling isn’t sexy. But being a clear-headed, intentional man is. ✍️🔥#Growth #Fatherhood #shorts

Pat talks about using a journal to review the day, understand his reactions, and decide what he wants to do differently.

Why Every Father Needs to Journal ✍️ (31-Day Guide in Description) #shorts

Pat explains how journaling helps him get clear on what to do next and points fathers to his guide for building the habit.

@blakeoftoday is Finally on YouTube! (Pure Gold) 🏆 I love this clip. #Fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat highlights a Blake Kasemeier video and explains why he appreciates Blake’s thoughtful approach to discussing fatherhood.

Not sure why I felt called to share this… but maybe someone needed to hear it. #fatherhood #shorts

Pat shares how two decades of fitness coaching and gradual choices he and Taz made together led to the life they have.

You can’t just want results - you have to choose the habits that create them. #shorts

Pat discusses choosing the daily habits that support a physical goal and following through on them after the motivation fades.

Most dads don’t have an anger problem. They have a stress problem. #fatherhood #dadlife #shorts

Pat connects a short temper with accumulated stress and shares habits he uses to lower his baseline before family life tests him.

Why Some Fathers Have a Short Fuse (And Others Don’t) #fatherhood #dadlife #selfdiscipline #shorts

A clip about how sleep, stress, and personal habits can affect the capacity a dad has for staying patient.

4 Things Every Father Will Face (Ready or Not) Strong fathers build strong families. #shorts

A preview of Pat’s longer video on the tests and transitions fathers should expect to face.

Garlic fries are not worth it. It’s time for me to let go. Yes, that’s my handwriting. #shorts

Pat uses deciding to give up garlic fries as a small example of being honest about a habit and choosing to change it.

Doing the Work as a Father Changes Everything. There Is No More Important Task Than This #shorts

Pat encourages fathers who know they have work to do to take it seriously because their children are watching how they respond.

3 Days. No Phone. No Responsibility. Just Clarity for Fathers. link in my bio #fatherhood #shorts

Pat describes a three-day, phone-free retreat that gives fathers space to reflect and decide what needs their attention.

Keeping with the book theme from yesterday. #shorts

Pat shares why he values books that challenge what he already believes and help him think about how he can serve others.

Honor is dead, but Ill see what I can do #fantasy #stormlight #redrising #fatherhood #shorts

Pat talks about finding examples of honor, masculinity, and fatherhood in epic fantasy books.

I dunno just been on my mind a bunch recently Read the description #Fatherhood #selfhelp #shorts

Pat questions how well self-help advice from wealthy entrepreneurs without children fits the responsibilities and constraints of a father’s life.

One Simple Way to Identify Real Personal Growth as a Man #fatherhood #mensgrowth #maturity #shorts

Pat discusses using honest reflection and ownership of your blind spots to recognize whether you are growing.

Turn Stress into Growth with This One Simple Trick Breathe, Reframe, Grow #mindset #shorts

Pat shares how he uses his breath and a shift in perspective to make stress easier to work with.

How Men Become Less Fragile-Emotional Regulation Growth #fragile #antifragile #fatherhood #shorts

Pat reflects on recurring moments of emotional fragility and the work that has helped him respond to them more steadily over time.

Intentional Men Build Better Lives Conversation with @tfitx #intentionalliving #shorts

In a conversation with @tfitx, Pat talks about living with intention and what discipline and purpose look like for a father.

As you are I was, as I am you will be As I age I appreciate art more and more #fatherhood #shorts

Pat shares how aging and fatherhood changed his relationship to art and made it a source of reflection.

Wake Up and Chill Finding peace matters-especially as a father #shorts

Pat explains how starting the morning with stillness helps him find the patience and clarity he wants as a father.

You Dont Control the Feeling - You Control What Comes Next #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

In a clip with Coach Joe, Pat discusses recognizing the feeling that comes up and taking responsibility for what you do next.

The 3 Areas Im Still Working On as a Father (Finance, Focus, Value) #fatherhood #growth #shorts

Pat names money, focus, and how he values himself as three areas fatherhood has made him examine more honestly.

Honesty and Ownership Action is the only remedy I have found in my own life. #fatherhood #shorts

Pat describes how he pairs honest self-assessment and ownership with action when he wants to change something in his life.

Owning My Failures Made Me a Better Father and Leader #shorts

Pat reflects on reviewing past failures with grace, recognizing his part in recurring patterns, and using that knowledge to become more accountable.

Take the Third Path - The One Most Men Avoid #fatherhood #masculinity #shorts

Pat calls for a deliberate approach to masculinity built around discipline, responsibility, and purposeful action.

Think About Outcomes Before Taking Advice #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat recommends naming the outcome you want before trying parenting advice and judging it by what actually happens in your family.

Becoming a Father Changed Everything, Strong Fathers Are Built,Not Born #fatherhood #dadlife #shorts

Pat reflects on how much he has had to change since becoming a dad and what 13 years of parenting have taught him about growth.

Creators Who Constantly Inspire Me (Worth Following) #htketl #fatherhood #Parenting #shorts

Pat shares a few creators he learns from, including Blake Kasemeier, and describes what he values in their work.

Building Antifragile Men Harder to Kill, Easier to Love #fatherhood #parenting #antifragile #shorts

Pat explains his aim of helping men become more resilient and more available to the people they love.

90 Quit Their Goals - Be the 10 Who Doesnt #shorts

Pat shares tools he uses to stay accountable to goals after the early enthusiasm of a New Year’s resolution wears off.

Why Writing Down Your Goals Changes Everything Accountability for Fathers #shorts

Pat discusses writing goals down and introduces Buddy as the tool he built to keep track of his follow-through.

The Most Meaningful Last-Minute Gift for Fathers This Christmas #fatherhood #christmas #shorts

Pat presents a Fathers Guild retreat as a Christmas gift for a dad who could use time to reflect and reset.

Stop Waiting. Start Moving. A Message for Fathers Ready to Act #action #fatherhood #shorts

Pat encourages fathers who know what they want to change to pick a step and start acting on it.

A Real Conversation on Fatherhood Masculinity w Michael Hustle #fatherhood #htketl #shorts

A preview of Pat’s conversation with Michael Hustle about fatherhood, masculinity, and the way men develop.

Train Deeper Than Just Looking Good #fitness #fatherhood #shorts

Pat discusses finding reasons to train that will keep you engaged over time, including physical capability and a healthier relationship with yourself.

Only 3 Mens Retreats This Summer - 8 Spots Each #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat announces three summer men’s retreats and explains the limited group size and what he asks participants to bring to the experience.

Unfortunate, but no use crying over spilt milk. Maybe next time. #fatherhood #shorts

Pat uses an everyday setback to model letting go of a plan that went sideways and trying again later.

I Built This for Accountability (It Works),Accountability Changes Everything #personalgrowth #shorts

Pat introduces the accountability tool he built for himself and explains who else might find it helpful.

Why Healthy Conflict Is Worth Having #fatherhood #growthmindset #shorts

Pat invites a creator to have an open disagreement and explains why he thinks constructive conflict can teach both people something.

Honesty Reflection Action. Repeat. You Are Enough #fatherhood #growth #parenting #htketl #shorts

Pat shares a repeated practice of honest self-assessment, reflection, and action while appreciating where he is today.

Funny enough I did cut my finger#dadlife #fatherhood #lessonslearned #parenting #shorts

Pat jokes about cutting his finger and how quickly a hands-on mistake can make a lesson stick.

Ahh yes. Road rage. The canary in the coal mine for how good things are in side. #parenting #shorts

Pat uses road rage as an early signal to pay attention to the stress or emotions he is carrying into the rest of his day.

Growing Through Love Languages. Mistakes I Made So You Dont Have To #grow #love #fatherhood #shorts

Pat reflects on mistakes he made using love languages and how his understanding of them matured through his relationships.

Powerful Fatherhood Conversations You Need to Hear New Episodes Live Now #father #podcast #shorts

Pat highlights his conversation with @lifecoachatl and shares plans for more podcast episodes about fatherhood.

Masculinity isnt defined by colors or words. Grow stronger. #shorts

Pat questions judging masculinity by color choices or language and asks viewers to think about where actual strength comes from.

Real men share this with the real men in their lives #realmen #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat encourages men to support one another by being honest, reflecting, and showing up when it matters.

This is just how I do my life. Its not a condemnation of how you choose to do yours #father #shorts

Pat shares an approach that works in his own family and invites other parents to consider what fits their circumstances.

Sit with this thought for a day -itll shift something in you #fatherhood #parenting #htketl #shorts

Pat asks what you would change about the way you live as a father or partner if you knew you had little time left.

Full vid at the link in my bio #fatherhood #parenting #htketl #fragile #shorts

A preview of Pat’s longer reflection about fragility and his ongoing work to respond better to his boys.

Be the Role Model Your Kids Need Ep. 13 #fatherhood #selfcare #thefathersguild #truth #shorts

On Marc LaFleur’s podcast, Pat talks about working on the example he sets and how small changes can affect the children watching him.

Parenting, Growth Antifragility -My Most Honest Video Yet #parenting #growth #fatherhood #shorts

Pat introduces a longer video about growing through stress and recovery while staying present for his family.

How to Stay Present for Your Kids Without Losing Yourself Fatherhood Talk #fatherhood #shorts

Pat and Marc LaFleur discuss balancing family presence with identity, purpose, and time to keep developing as an individual.

Balancing Fatherhood Self-Care -Honest Conversation #fatherhood #selfcare #thefathersguild #shorts

Pat and Marc LaFleur talk about taking care of yourself while staying present for your kids and keeping a sense of purpose.

If you want to grow, be ready to hear the hard truth. #fatherhood #growth #parenting #shorts

Pat discusses asking people close to you for honest feedback about your behavior and listening long enough to learn from it.

You Dont Have What You Want? The Consistency Rule. #shorts

A preview of Pat’s longer explanation of how doing a manageable action repeatedly can help you reach a goal.

The Key to Being the Father You Want to Be Self-Efficacy #change #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat explains why believing you can succeed at a change matters when you are working on becoming the father you want to be.

Antifragility The Secret to Thriving Under Pressure MUST WATCH for Mens Growth #growth #shorts

Pat introduces antifragility and reflects on what can help men grow from the pressure and setbacks they face.

Why I Share My Fatherhood Journey (Its Not What You Think) #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat explains why he shares his experience of fatherhood publicly and makes room for other parents to see things differently.

Saying Yes to Adventure The Struggles, Stress Payoff of Memorable Fatherhood Moments #shorts

Pat discusses the work and stress involved in taking kids on adventures and why he still makes the effort to say yes.

Changing is hard. But changing because your kids need a better human - thats worth it. #shorts

Pat reflects on how wanting his children to have a better example gives him a strong reason to work through difficult changes.

This is so well articulated. I love it #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat shares a parenting message that resonated with him and encourages fathers who are figuring out how to keep showing up.

Are your choices adding or subtracting from your life? #fatherhood #dontbeadick #dontdie #shorts

Pat asks viewers to notice whether their daily choices and interactions contribute to their health and the lives of people around them.

If you want it for them you have to want it for you. You got this #takethenextstep #shorts

Pat asks fathers to take their own growth seriously and live out the qualities they want their kids to develop.

The internet cant hurt you unless you let it. Stay grounded #welcometotheinternet #shorts

Pat reflects on being selective about how much weight he gives to what people say online.

Consistency complexity. DM me if youre serious about getting after it. #fatherhood #shorts

Pat makes the case for a simple approach you can repeat when you want to make meaningful progress.

It was an interesting statistic. Not sure fully what it means but I think theres a lot here #shorts

Pat considers what a statistic he came across might say about fathers, parenting, and family life.

Why Real Strength Matters More Than Just Looking Strong Like, share, and subscribe #shorts

Pat reflects on the kind of strength and physical capability that can help men serve and protect their families.

Find the Struggle Take Action A Dads Guide #htketl #fatherhood #parenting #anger #shorts

Pat suggests identifying what area of life is under strain and asking what action is within your control.

HTKETL #fatherhood #parenting #htketl #thefathersguild #shorts

Pat reflects on his “Harder to Kill, Easier to Love” motto as a reminder to develop strength and remain open to others.

Helpful App to Help Dads Be More Present #fatherhood #parenting #phone #freedom #present #shorts

Pat shares the Unpluq app as a tool he uses to cut down on automatic phone use and be more present at home.

If youre concerned about social media and kids, look up Jonathan Haidt #parenting #shorts

Pat points parents concerned about children and social media to Jonathan Haidt’s work on the subject.

If you are trying your best? Give yourself some grace-theyll always want more #effort #shorts

Pat encourages dads who are making a real effort to give themselves grace when their children still want more of them.

Confident beliefs dont fear disagreementthey invite conversation #parenting #food #shorts

Pat reflects on hearing a different view as a chance to discuss an idea and learn what someone else sees in it.

Good friends say what you need to hearexactly how you need to hear it #shorts

Pat appreciates friends who point out something he is missing in a way that makes it easier for him to hear it.

There are fears worth having but lets be intentional with how we pass those on. #fear #shorts

Pat asks fathers to examine which fears help keep children safe and which fears they are passing on from their own experience.

Most changes feel clumsy at first. The hard talks bring us closer, every time #marriage #shorts

Pat reflects on how he and his wife work through awkward conversations and the closeness they can gain from doing it.

This whole thing doesnt matter unless you take action in real life. Thats the win. #shorts

Pat asks viewers to try one idea they find helpful in their own lives and pay attention to what changes.

Have had a number of these in my comments recently. #fatherhood #masculinity #selfawareness #shorts

Pat uses a sheepdog analogy to reflect on combining real strength with gentleness when talking about masculinity.

This 1-Min Clip bothered a lot of people #Fatherhood #parenting #dads #shorts

Pat revisits an old parenting clip and reflects on the range of reactions people brought to the same minute of footage.

Having been able to grow like this with my wife is something I am so damn grateful for. #shorts

Pat reflects on how letting go of the need to win arguments helped him communicate more humbly with his wife.

Strong kind. Ive got work to do. #strong #kind #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat reflects on his own work to model both strength and kindness for the boys he is raising.

Finding Balance Through Every Stage of Life Fatherhood Growth #balance #fatherhood #shorts

Pat describes noticing when he is leaning too far in one direction and adjusting as his responsibilities and priorities change.

When I eventually host a fatherhood retreat at my house, this will 100 be part of it #shorts

Pat discusses making blacksmithing part of a future fatherhood retreat and why working with metal feels meaningful to him.

Ive been doing damn good on the front recently so figured I would share whats been working #shorts

Pat shares what has been helping him spend less time on his phone and pay more attention to family life.

Onward and upward #terminated #work #fatherhood #life #parenting #realmenrise #shorts

Pat talks about losing his job and how he wants to move forward while still showing up for his family.

This 1-month challenge changed how I live and Im not going back. #noyellchallenge #shorts

Pat reflects on how a month-long challenge changed the way he responds and became a practice he wants to continue.

Not sponsored. I dont have a code. This is just a good resource. @reframeapp #fatherhood #shorts

Pat shares the Reframe app as a resource he has used for his own reflection and growth.

Love who you areand grow from there. Start with honesty. #fatherhood #reflection #shorts

Pat describes being able to like who he is while still being honest about the areas where he wants to grow.

Growth in marriage takes twoand someone has to take the first step. #love #marriage #shorts

Pat reflects on what happened when he started letting go of small disagreements and how his wife’s willingness to do the same helped them grow.

Taking care of myself makes parenting easier in the long run. Balance is key. #shorts

Pat explains how sleep, exercise, eating well, and taking time for himself help him handle difficult parenting moments.

Pay attention to the little things. Be present. Gratitude grows when you cherish each moment #shorts

Pat encourages tired parents to notice small moments with their children and let that attention build gratitude.

Not everyones opinion matterslearn to filter out the noise and focus on what truly matters #shorts

Pat describes filtering comments and opinions so he can focus on the feedback that has a real bearing on his life.

Why Love Languages Matter Even If Theyre Imperfect #LoveLanguages #Relationships #shorts

Pat discusses using love languages to understand how a partner receives care and to notice when your usual way of expressing it misses them.

Antifragile is the goal for me. Vulnerability isnt weakness its strength #antifragile #shorts

Pat reflects on how acknowledging weakness honestly can help fathers learn to respond better under pressure.

Honesty strengthens your soul even when its hard #Honesty #LifeLessons #Parenting #shorts

Pat reflects on the value of telling the truth when it is difficult and on teaching honesty by practicing it around children.

Make fear a tailwind A lesson I want my kids to carry for life #fear #parenting #worthy #shorts

Pat shares a line about using fear as a tailwind and explains what he hopes his children learn from it.

No, Im not paying my kids to make me yell heres why this actually works #noyellchallenge #shorts

Pat responds to questions about whether his $5 No Yell Challenge gives his children an incentive to provoke him and explains how he set the rules.

Day 6 done. 5 total in payouts just enough to make me pause before choosing to yell. #shorts

Pat reports one $5 payout by day six of the No Yell Challenge and reflects on how the rule helps him remember to pause.

Why I Stopped Wearing My Parenting Sucks Shirtand What Changed My Mind #parenting #shorts

Pat explains the skateboarding joke behind his old “Parenting Sucks” shirt and why he reconsidered repeating that message.

Make Fear a Tailwind, Not a HeadwindPowerful Parenting Mindset #fear #parenting #shorts

Pat reflects on helping children notice fear and use it as energy to move forward with something that matters to them.

Finding Better Ways to DisciplineNo Yelling, Just Growth Boundaries #fatherhood #shorts

Pat describes using his No Yell Challenge to practice holding a boundary and disciplining his children with a calmer response.

Be curious. #curiosity #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat offers a brief reminder to approach fatherhood with curiosity.

30-day no-yelling challenge 5 penalty per slip-up. Tough start, but committed to change. #shorts

Pat sets the terms of a 30-day challenge to stop yelling and shares how quickly he owed his first $5.

Writing down your goals significantly increases the likelihood of achieving them. #change #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to write down a goal and reflects on how that gives a hoped-for change a more concrete starting point.

Of course there is more complexity to being okay but doing this is a fantastic start #shorts

Pat suggests using hands-on work or physical effort as a starting point for reconnecting with a sense of purpose and accomplishment.

Overcoming Fear Breaking the Cycle for a Stronger, Happier Next Generation #fear #live #shorts

Pat encourages fathers to examine how much danger is present and how their fears influence what their children learn to avoid.

Balancing Provision and Presence in Family Life #fatherhood #parenting #growth #sauna #shorts

Pat describes using quiet time in the sauna to reflect on how to provide for his family and stay present with them.

Antifragile... Vulnerability isn't weakness. Its strength in honesty growth. #parenting #shorts

Pat reflects on vulnerability as being willing to see what needs work and take on the challenge of changing it.

Awareness changes everything. Im proud of how far Ive come. #Growth #Mindset #shorts

Pat shares how noticing his own harsh reactions gave him a chance to take responsibility for behavior he wanted to change.

Antifragile is the goal for me #fatherhood #antifragile #parenting #resilience #strength #shorts

Pat explains why antifragility matters to him as a father and what it means to try to grow through hard experiences.

Is there a connection? Lets talk. Share your thoughts in the comments. #fatherhood #shorts

Pat invites viewers to weigh in on a possible connection he has noticed in parenting and share how they see it.

Acceptance. Direction. Action. Follow through on your ideastheyre worth it.#acceptance #shorts

Pat shares a repeatable practice of accepting what is happening, choosing a direction, and taking an action that moves an idea forward.

Create space. One step to better fatherhood pause before reacting. Progress,not perfection! #shorts

Pat encourages fathers to take a mental pause or step away briefly before deciding how to respond in a tense moment.

Confidence through Competence #fatherhood #parenting #failure #confidence #shorts

Pat explains how trying, failing, and gaining competence can give people real reasons to trust what they are capable of.

A false choice said with conviction is a strong way to win social media I have heard. #shorts

Pat discusses recognizing false choices in online arguments and looking for an option beyond domination or submission.

Broken bonds can heal if we try. Whats your take? #relationships #forgiveness #parenting #shorts

Pat reflects on a harsh comment and considers what it takes to repair a relationship when people are willing to try.

Great parenting starts with self-reflection. Who you are matters more than what you do #shorts

Pat describes how self-awareness, regulation, and the quality of a father’s relationships shape what his children experience.

Lets match the discipline to the crime and own our mistakes as parents. #fatherhood #parenting

Pat explains why a consequence should fit the behavior and why it matters to own it when your reaction goes too far.

Maybe it was just me . Its a lovely time of year but Im very glad to be in January #shorts

Pat reflects on the pressure of December deadlines, gatherings, and family responsibilities and the relief he feels when January arrives.

Writing starts with boredom, but habits make it natural. Use my prompts to start now. #shorts

Pat describes giving himself enough quiet to start writing, then using prompts and repetition to make journaling a habit.

Your tone shapes trust. I took a moment to have a brief interview with my wife Tamaryn. #shorts

Pat and Taz discuss how children can hear an intense tone as anger and how changing delivery can build more trust.

Carry the weight, rest when needed, and grow stronger every step of the way#LifeLessons #shorts

Pat uses carrying a heavy bomb as a way to think about responsibility, the pressure it creates, and the value of putting it down to rest.

What? Why? What? Full 430 video on YouTube at the link in my bio #parenting #shorts

Pat outlines three questions he uses after a mistake to understand what happened, why it happened, and what he will do next.

Life’s a bomb—rest, grow, ask for help, but never let it slip. Keep carrying on. #shorts

Pat expands on his 50-pound-bomb analogy for carrying responsibility and recognizing when to rest or ask someone for help.

3 years later, still learning to grow and regulate my emotions. That push was needed. #shorts

Pat reflects on a lesson from Hunt, Gather, Parent that challenged him to work on emotional regulation and where he is three years later.

Think twice before judging, growth takes effort. Dive deeper. #LifeLessons #KeepGrowing #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to consider someone’s broader context before drawing conclusions about them from a brief clip.

The more resistance you feel to reflect, the more you'll gain. Face it head-on #journal #shorts

Pat talks about leaning into the discomfort of sitting down to reflect and how that effort can reveal something he needs to examine.

Had a sleepless night and a metaphor hit me. Full video on my YouTube! #fatherhood #life #shorts

A preview of Pat’s longer video about the weight of life and learning when to carry it, recover, or ask for help.

Changing my tendencies improved my marriage. I highly recommend giving it a try #conflict #shorts

Pat reflects on his default response to conflict and how learning to adjust it improved his marriage.

Frick off resistance. Im moving forward. #thenextstep #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat talks about facing illness and resistance while launching The Next Step podcast and choosing to keep moving forward.

Question studies, rethink languagetheres no one way to do things! #CriticalThinking #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to ask how a study was done, funded, and framed before relying on claims about what it shows.

Sharing parenting ideas in longer videos. Full 7-min discussion in my bio! #fatherhood #shorts

Pat invites viewers to hear a longer discussion where he has more time to explain a parenting idea.

Curious about your thoughts on this order. It makes sense to me, but love other views! #shorts

Pat explains why he takes care of basic needs first so he has more capacity to be present and reflect as a father.

Being present with my boys makes me happier and more grateful. Improving my life is fun! #shorts

Pat reflects on how being present with his boys makes him happier and gives him another reason to keep working on himself.

Take Responsibility or Stay a Boy with a Mans Face Hard Truth About Growing Up #manhood #shorts

Pat describes accepting responsibility for your actions and your life as an important step toward maturity.

Starting a blog to share my ideas! Check it out at thefathersguild.com #fatherhood #blog #shorts

Pat announces a blog and explains how writing gives him space to develop the fatherhood ideas he discusses in short clips.

The Power of Honesty Build Integrity for Yourself and Your Kids #fatherhood #parenting #shorts

Pat talks about aligning his actions with what he says and modeling that kind of honesty for his children.

WILD VOICE PODCAST Season 2 Ep 7 The Pat Episode - Fatherhood The Yelling Challenge #shorts

A Wild Voice Podcast excerpt featuring Pat and his challenge to change how often he yells at his children.

Health has balance. I journal-How will I eat today? Whats my fitness plan? Intent counts #shorts

Pat describes adding questions about food and training to his journal so he can approach those parts of the day with more intention.

Please Listen to doctors they are here to help. But basics work stay consistent and honest #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to listen to doctors and reflects on the role he gives consistency and honesty in practicing basic health habits.

Learning to replace anger with the right emotionsstill a work in progress, but worth it. #shorts

Pat describes learning to recognize when anger was covering another emotion and practicing ways to identify what he was actually feeling.

Season 2 Ep 7 The Pat Episode - Fatherhood The Yelling Challenge #shorts

A Wild Voice Podcast clip about the daily work involved in Pat’s challenge to stop yelling at his children.

Disagreements dont make enemies.They create opportunities to learn.Stay calm,have the convo #shorts

Pat describes staying calm and curious in disagreement so it becomes a chance for both people to learn.

Started Dec 1 with renewed focus on yelling less. Down just 5 so fargoal is under 10 for Dec #shorts

Pat shares his December progress on yelling less and explains why a stressful month gives him a chance to practice staying regulated.

Good company Words from @save.your.sons #fatherhood #dad #parenting #life #shorts

Pat shares a reminder from @save.your.sons about how a partner, friends, and everyday habits can shape the direction of your life.

Hard to know if you are moving forward if you dont know where you have been #Fatherhood #shorts

Pat encourages fathers to write down their choices and reflections so they can see where they started and what has changed.

Masculinity is hard work and staying physical. Sparring at 46 builds confidence. #Strength #shorts

A reflection on hard work, physical capability, and the confidence that can come from continuing to spar at 46.

The book titled worth defending its a fun read with some nuggets of wisdom sprinkled throughout 📖✨

Pat shares Worth Defending as an enjoyable book that gave him a few ideas to reflect on.

Marriage is about teamwork and commitment dont quit when it gets tough. Counseling helps #shorts

A discussion about treating marriage as teamwork and using communication and counseling to work through difficult periods.

Holidays weren't always joyful growing up, but now I focus on creating core memories for my kids. 🙏🏾

A reflection on how memories of difficult holidays can affect how a parent handles celebrations and what they want to create for their own kids.

Grateful I can reflect on what I couldve done better without letting it destroy me. #father #shorts

Pat shares his gratitude for being able to reflect on what he could have done better without getting stuck in self-criticism.

Why Is It So Hard to Stay Present #bepresent #mindfulness #staygrounded #personalgrowth #shorts

Pat explores what makes it difficult to stay present, even when being grounded in the moment feels good.

Put in the Effort When You Can. If Not, Stay Ready for Your Next Opportunity #fatherhood #bettermen

Pat encourages fathers to use the periods when they have room to put more effort in and look for the next opening when life is crowded.

We are important. There is a lot on our shoulders. Thats okay. We are strong. #shorts

Pat acknowledges the weight fathers carry and encourages them to remember the importance of the role and the strength they can bring to it.

I always let my kids know how I feelno guessing games, Honest communication builds trust #Pa #shorts

Pat describes telling his kids how he feels so they can understand what is going on and learn to talk about their own emotions.

I m not sure its something that can be taught.It may just need to be experienced #acceptance #shorts

Pat reflects on the kind of grace he learned through the experience of being a father and how differently other dads may arrive at it.

Get that stuff out of your mind and onto paper. Its hard at first but a game changer #journa #shorts

Pat talks about getting recurring thoughts out of his head and onto paper so he can think more clearly.

The most important step a man can take? The next one Forgive, grow, and keep moving forward #shorts

Pat encourages viewers to forgive themselves after a setback and focus on the next action they can take.

Dec is a hard month to do this. I personally think that makes it better for us. link in bio #shorts

Pat invites dads to take on a challenge in December and explains why the difficulty of the month can make it more meaningful.

Divorce, Identity, and Starting Over My Story #DivorceRecovery #ParentingAfterDivorce #shorts

The speaker discusses rebuilding a sense of identity after divorce and adjusting to spending less time with his children day to day.

Action - Inaction. Stop scrolling, start doing. Take on something hard until it’s no longer hard!💪

Pat asks viewers to stop scrolling, choose a difficult task, and keep working on it until it becomes more manageable.

From Fear to Freedom : My Psychedelic Journey with Heroic Hearts #anxietyawareness #faceyourfears

A reflection on confronting fear and anxiety during a psychedelic retreat with Heroic Hearts and what the speaker took from the experience.

Walking the Right Path The Beauty of the Middle Ground #BalanceInLife #PersonalGrowth #Findi #shorts

Pat reflects on finding a workable middle ground when people at both ends of a debate disagree with him.

Why Regret Can Be Your Greatest Teacher #NoRegrets #LifeLessons #PersonalGrowth #MindsetShif #shorts

Pat discusses learning from regrets and using them to decide which chances he wants to take going forward.

Parenting challenge What small change could make a big difference in your life? Reflect and #shorts

Pat asks parents to write down one change that could improve how they show up and choose a small step they can try.

Parenting Lessons for Life and Leadership #LifeLessons #ParentingMotivation #ParentingRealTalk

Pat reflects on how parenting has changed him as a friend, spouse, and leader, and on the role his circumstances play in that experience.

Marriage From Struggles to Success #StrongerTogether #LoveAndMarriage #MarriageGoals #LoveWi #shorts

A reflection on working through a difficult period of marriage and putting effort into becoming partners again.

Learning to See Beyond Yourself #PersonalGrowth #EmpathyInAction #UnderstandingOthers #BeThe #shorts

Pat reflects on learning to notice how someone else wants to be treated and adjusting how you show up for them.

Are You Truly Ready for Kids? Its More Than Finances #HealthyParenting #RelationshipGoals #shorts

Pat asks prospective parents to consider their health, stress management, values, and connection alongside money when deciding if they are ready for children.

What True Vulnerability Really Means Strength in Asking for Help #EmotionalWellness #Persona #shorts

Pat describes vulnerability as being honest about needing help and turning to people who can support you.

Disagreeing Without Being Toxic #RespectfulDebate #StandStrong #SocialMedia #AgreeToDisagree #shorts

Pat talks about holding a strong opinion and speaking respectfully with someone who sees things differently.

When Your Kids Mirror You #ParentingJourney #SelfReflection #LeadByExample #RaisingKids #BeT #shorts

Pat reflects on recognizing his own habits in the behaviors that frustrate him in his kids and treating that recognition as a prompt to change.

Why Disagreeing is Key to Growth #GrowthMindset #DifferentPerspectives #HealthyDebate #Socia #shorts

Pat discusses seeking out conversations with people who hold different views and using disagreement to examine what you believe.

How Listening Deepens Relationships #Perspective #Relationships #GrowthMindset #ListenToUnde #shorts

Pat explains how listening to another person’s perspective can reveal something you missed and strengthen the relationship.

Fatherhood’s Secret Power: Hitting Reset Anytime #Fatherhood #parenting #dadlife #startfresh #shorts

Pat reminds fathers that any moment can be a chance to reset, learn from what happened, and choose a different response.

They're Just Little Nuggets - Understanding Your Kids' Needs #parenting #parenthood #fatherhood

Pat encourages adults who feel overwhelmed by little kids to consider what they need and try a small adjustment.

Why You Should Never Stop Pushing Your Limits #StayCurious #ChallengeYourself #KeepPushing # #shorts

Pat reflects on staying engaged in life by testing your limits, helping other people, and continuing to ask questions.

Order of parental well being

Pat shares the order in which he prioritizes his well-being as a parent and asks how other fathers approach it.

Not my quote but got me good. ❤️💀🤘🏻 #fathersadvice #parenting #fatherhood

Pat shares a quote that struck him and relates it to his reflections on fatherhood.

May 11, 2024

Watching footage of a cold-water jump with his son, Pat notices how his son looked toward him and reflects on sharing the moment more fully.

Take action. Do shit. #parenting #fathersadvice

Pat gives fathers a short prompt to take action on what they know needs their attention.

Service. Freedom. Humility #parenting #fathersadvice

Pat uses a Marcus Aurelius passage to reflect on finding meaning through service, freedom, and humility.

How cool is that. #fathersadvice #parenting #fatherhood

Pat reminds fathers that they can decide in the next moment to reset and do something differently.

Extreme ownership + extreme honesty #parenting #fathersadvice #fatherhood

A brief fatherhood reflection on taking responsibility for your actions and being honest about what you need to change.

❤️🤘🏻💀 #fatherhood #parenting #htketl

Pat reminds parents that young children are doing their best to get a need met and that a small change can help.

#space #fatherhood #parenting

A brief fatherhood clip about making space in parenting.

Don’t hang onto regret. Own your part in it. Learn from it. Move on. #dad #fatherhood #parenting

Pat talks about taking ownership of your part in a regret, learning from it, and moving forward.

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